“I’ll push through anything” - The Achiever
In this newsletter series, I’ve introduced you to WIMPs. In this edition, we’ll do a deep dive into the third WIMP, the Achiever.
Never heard of WIMPs? Check out our last newsletter edition, ‘The Hardass’ to get familiar with what I’m talking about.
The Achiever
The Achiever exhibits a perpetual sense of urgency, always asking, “Are we there yet?” Impatience is what characterizes their approach. They have massive FOMO and are constantly worried that if they’re not on their game 24/7, someone younger, hungrier, and better will surpass them.
The achiever proudly exclaims that they can outwork anyone.
Achievers are constantly eyeing the next promotion, award, accolade, or title. Success and achievements immediately get swallowed up in the black hole that is their need for external validation. This usually means that no accomplishment can ever make them feel satisfied.
They don’t pause to celebrate victories, instead finding temporary solace in constant productivity and the relentless pursuit of outcomes and achievement.
Core strength:
The Achiever will push through heavy workloads and demanding timelines to accomplish the goal.
Core fear:
If I stop or slow down, I will be seen as lazy, and be judged as a failure.
Core Drivers:
🔷 Power
🔷 Protection from the judgment of others
🔷 Insatiable black hole in need of external validation
Catchphrases:
🔷 If I’m not winning, I’m losing.
🔷 If I just had X, I’d be satisfied.
🔷 Once this project is done, I’ll take a vacation.
🔷 I’m never satisfied with my success and achievement.
🔷 If I got that promotion, people would finally respect me.
🔷 If I’m not progressing, I’m not worthy of the position I have.
🔷 If I get this award, my boss will have to say yes to my request for a raise.
Early in our professional experience, we're programmed to believe that success is defined by our ability to lead and to consistently progress and achieve titles, authority, compensation, and accolades. We strive, fight, and persevere to attain these markers of external validation—outward signs that we've been deemed worthy. Of course, there is nothing wrong with being bold and setting ambitious goals.
Nevertheless, the problem arises when we link our intrinsic self-worth to external validation and rewards.
We all know this, but it's challenging to remember when much of leadership culture encourages us to measure our intrinsic value on the size of our teams, job titles, and annual bonuses. Have you ever caught yourself comparing the size of your team or organization to that of a colleague or peer? Have you ever had a case of org chart envy?
And it often feels like even if you have reached the upper echelons of business, you can't relax.
You must constantly prove that you deserve to be there. Rise and grind! Hustle! We can fall prey to the idea that our value lies in the doing, rather than the being.
The more we do, achieve, and perform, the better we will appear to others.
Of course, leadership comes with delivering results, meeting performance metrics, and hitting goals. However, this lack of focus on just being is exactly where self-compassion can help us calibrate and balance the external and internal, the doing and being. Deploying self-compassion reminds us that external validation is a finger trap: the children's toy that catches your index fingers in a bamboo tube.
The more you struggle and pull, the tighter you’re gripped in the trap.
Similarly, the more we hunt and pursue an external confirmation of our internal worth and let the world dictate whether we feel enough, the harder it is to escape from that trap. Employing self-compassion allows us to loosen our grip to escape.
Would you like to meet the rest of your WIMPs?
Stay tuned for deep dives like this in the monthly editions to follow. If you know someone who might find this helpful, please forward this along. New readers can subscribe here.
